When PPC does NOT work, there’s a really short list of possible reasons:

1. The market is stupid-crazy competitive for some reason (think giant hail storm).
2. The company isn’t answering their phone.
3. They’re answering their phone, but they’re doing a really crappy job.

Number 1 is extremely rare, so it’s usually a combination of 2 and 3.

So sure enough, we recently started a new PPC campaign for a client, and the lead cost was prohibitively high.

So the first thing we check is the “lost call” stats to see if they are answering the phone. And if they are answering the phone properly.

Nope. And nope.

The people answering the company phone had no knowledge of the company’s products or how to close a lead. In many cases, they didn’t even attempt to get the prospects’ names.

As a result, the company lost 8 out of 22 PPC leads (and $76,500) for that week. Their cost per lead also shot from $184.66 to an unacceptable $293.95 for the cycle.

Think about that. Tens-of-thousands of dollars LOST—all because the jokers answering their phone couldn’t book an appointment.

Guess what we get to hear? “Hey, this isn’t working!”

Give me a break. Listen and see what YOU think:

Lost Opportunity #1 (4/14/16): “We Don’t Do Friday Afternoon Appointments”

click here to listen to the call

This prospect has a limited schedule, but you’ll hear him practically BEGGING for an appointment.

It’s an agonizingly drawn-out conversation that boils down to this:

Prospect: “Is it possible to get a quote in the next few days?”

Company: “Sorry, we’re booked until next week.”

P: “Okay, does next Friday afternoon work?”

C: “Sorry, we don’t do appointments on Friday afternoons.”

P: “Okay, do you do appointments on weekends?”

C: “Sorry, we don’t do appointments on weekends.”

P: “Okay. Let me check my schedule and call you back. Sorry to bug you.”

C: “That’s okay. Have a great day.”

::click::

At least they were polite.

Lost Opportunity #2 (4/21/16): “I’m Not Really Picky About Windows”

click here to listen to the call

This prospect asks the phone rep, “What windows would you put on your own home?”

But instead of extolling all of the amazing benefits of the windows the company installs—she shrugs and says, “I’m not really picky about windows.”

Are you kidding me?

NEGATIVE BONUS POINTS AWARDED for the awkward end to the conversation with no attempt to schedule an appointment or capture contact info.

—

Look, we’re not picking on this company or its employees just for fun. We’re doing it to teach you an extremely valuable (and expensive) lesson: PPC is GUARANTEED to work for you—but only if you do your part.

It’s real easy:

1. Have somebody who knows something about your products answering the phone. (I was going to write “don’t let an idiot answer your phone” but that seemed crude.)

2. Be nice.

3. Have appointments available. If you’re genuinely jammed up, let us know and we can take the foot off the PPC pedal until you get caught up.

4. Answer a few basic questions if they ask. (see #1, alternate version)

Here’s the good news: We record, listen to, and track every single phone call FOR YOU. If you’re messing up, we pull the plug and make you fix the problem.

Will other companies do that for you? Nope—they just let you flail in the water until you drown.

Let us know if we can help you out.

P.S. You’ll see some more ridiculous examples of terrible call handling in a couple weeks. You can’t make this stuff up.

© 2016, Rich Harshaw. All rights reserved.